My Story

I decided to start a blog so our friends and family can follow our journey to China to bring home our son Matthew. I had originally started a blog more than one year ago. I never got past the header. It was originally called "A Sister for Katie". I just assumed when we eventually get the referral for a girl (under 15 months old) that we requested, I would resume with it. Little did I know a series of events would not lead us to a sister for my Katie, it would lead us to her brother. Getting to this point, however, has been one big emotional roller coaster ride. When we sent our dossier in more than 2 years ago, the wait was anticipated to be about 1 1/2 years at the longest, but here we were still facing yet another possible 2 year wait on top of the 2 years we had already waited. I should also mention, somewhere in the 2 years of waiting we started a Vietnam adoption that had a series of unfortunate events and then finally ended when Vietnam closed all adoptions to the United States. We then focused back on China, but I knew the longer it would take the less likely we would go through with it. My husband had already started grumbling that we were getting older and was asking if this is still really what we wanted. After all, we are turning 46 this year. We already have the perfect family he said, and he is right, but watching my 5 year old play alone, we realized that she needed a sibling, a best friend, like my sister is to me. But how.....................................

In late December my adoption agency announced that they had been invited to China by the CCAA (China Center of Adoption Affairs) to do a "workshop" at one of the many orphanages and that they had been given the opportunity to meet, interview and place 42 children (almost all of them with moderate special needs), so when the list came in, I was surprised to see that there were 2 healthy older (5 years old) boys on the list, I asked my agency to get info on one of these boys (Lucas) who had caught my eye. My agency provided us with video and pics that they personally took. He seemed to be perfect, but this was so far from what we had been waiting for....this was not a princess, this was a pirate, I don't know anything about little pirates.. A boy...A son....Okay we can do this....Yes we will do this, we will have a son, a brother for Katie. Surely there was no way to look at this other than this was clearly a sign from above and this must be the child meant for us. We said Yes, we want this little boy and we immediately began to love him. It would be only two weeks later that my agency would call to deliver some very unfortunate news regarding the son we thought we would be ours. Lucas had already been given to another family by the CCAA and they had been working on his file longer than we had. A terrible paperwork mixup had occurred in China. This was devastating for us. His face was embedded in my mind. Our hearts were broken, I literally cried for two months. My agency promised she would do everything in her power to find us another child that would be perfect for us. And I know they were. I tried to hold on and have faith, but how much longer could I allow my heart to ache. I was depressed and crying everyday. After a talk with my husband and listening to his concerns, I had to agree, maybe it was time to think about letting it go. I sat down at my computer at 10:30 pm with tears and wrote my agency that we weren't sure we would continue pursuing another adoption. I sent my email that night. Ironically, it was also the eve of my daughter's birthday and her gotcha day 4 years ago.

When the phone rang the next day and it was Diana at my agency, I thought surely she was calling me because of the email I sent, wanting to encourage me to hang in there. So when I said hello and she responded with "I'm looking at him", in a quiet calm voice, it didn't register what she was saying, so she said it again, "I'm looking at him"......WHAT.... What do you mean....."he's beautiful she said and he is yours". I just couldn't breathe. So that's my story we have a son and my daughter has a brother, a gift for for her 5th birthday.....hence, the start of my blog......... A brother for Katie Mei.